Why men and women avoid personal training with the opposite sex

All gyms are a place for many types of gym goers, this does not include strength gyms and women-only fitness centers. All gyms offer personal training. There has always been some separation between male and female personal trainers. The big question here is why do men and women avoid personal training with the opposite sex?

From a female personal trainer perspective, I see this avoidance of male and female personal trainers quite often. First, most personal trainers are willing to work with anyone and everyone. Some may prefer older adults, men, women, children or just athletes. In my own personal experience, some older women tend to avoid male personal trainers because they feel they are only into bodybuilding, which reduces the chances of training with a male trainer. Some women think that male trainers are the “arrogant” type. A good majority of women only want to train with female trainers because they don’t feel comfortable training with men. Most women look for coaches who are understanding and knowledgeable. Some look for trainers who specialize in certain aspects of training, such as weight loss, corrective exercise, strength training, and have no preference for men or women.

I ran into a gym goer the other day while training some clients. Let’s call her “Connie.” She talked to some of my clients, both men and women. She asked them about my ability as a personal trainer as well as my personality. My clients then discussed my training methods and personality. When I went up and introduced myself, she said that she had been looking for a personal trainer for a while and that I seemed like the type of trainer she wanted to work with. Of course I had to ask him why. Hearing some frustration in her voice, she said that she was intimidated by the male personal trainers that she had seen at this particular gym. She needed to be trained by someone else “like her”, ie a female personal trainer.

On very rare occasions have men come to me for advice on how to achieve goals. Okay, I’m always willing to help anyone with any fitness related question whether they are men, women, young and old. I have had men deliberately avoid me like the plague in the gym even though they have watched me train for several months. Doesn’t the lettering on the back of my uniform say “Personal Trainer”? Am I bullying? Do you think my years of experience and knowledge are inadequate? Am I not strong enough to detect you? “Do you think you will offend me while talking to me?”

A few years ago while at the gym with my husband. I was watching him on his last set on the bench press. There was a guy on the chest press who clearly needed help. He waited until my husband finished and walked past me without saying a word and asked my husband for a spot. He was disappointed. He may not be 6 foot and 200 pounds, but I can clearly see a grown man lifting 200+ pounds. I was deliberately ignored. The question is why? Is it a testosterone thing? Don’t feel comfortable asking a personal trainer for help? Is it the male ego?

According to an anonymous source, I have successfully received some answers to my previous questions. Most of the men prefer to train with male personal trainers due to their body type or physique. Training with another man who is fit or “fit” will ultimately result in the same fitness results. Many men believe that female trainers have no knowledge or no way to relate to them. Others see female trainers as a distraction, they may have an attitude or a bad personality. Some men care less as long as their fitness goals are met. In some cases, men prefer a female trainer because working out with a male personal trainer makes them feel out of shape. There is definitely a pattern with both sides. Everyone wants personal training with someone they can relate to, whether it’s a male or female trainer. Ultimately, the choice is up to you.

While researching this particular topic, I found little to no detailed information on why men avoid personal training from women.