Tags and Categories: Does your child have “special needs”?

It’s a drama that is played over and over again in every city in the country, sometime between preschool and second grade. A child’s teachers are concerned that the child is not performing at the expected level and ask the parents to speak with the child’s doctor. The parents reluctantly bring it up at the doctor’s office, and the doctor speaks directly to the teacher. Suddenly, the acronyms begin to flow: does the child have ADHD? What about CAPD? Maybe it’s DDS-NOS?…and the only thing parents are thinking is “Our child is not a label”.

That thought is not only perfectly natural, it is absolutely correct. No child is a label, and in fact, assigning a label to your child will affect how your life progresses for much of your foreseeable future. The important part for any parent to remember as they learn that their child may not be quite typical is that etiquette can, and in many cases is, a positive change for a child who is truly struggling.

an honest story

A man named Michael was kind enough to share his story of his struggle with a son who needed help:

“My name is Michael and I spent a year insisting that my son didn’t have ADHD. I didn’t think ADHD was real; we’ve heard so many stories about how it’s overdiagnosed and so many kids are on Adderall and Ritalin or whatever, so , how could my son really have it? I told his teachers he was just a kid, just a little rambunctious, and they could deal with it.”

“Then one day, six months into the school year, his teacher called us in for a meeting, and he basically had a meltdown in front of us. Our son already had an IEP because he had speech delays, and they had used it quietly. IEP for our son to have seven people helping him every day of school.He had a speech therapist, an occupational therapist, a physical therapist, three assistants and his normal teacher…and he was still completely unable to get through most days. “

“It took us by surprise, but it’s because we didn’t want to deal with the fact that our son might have problems beyond his speech delays (which he easily outgrew in kindergarten). So we started looking into it. My mother-in-law is a nutritionist, and she gave us a lot of advice about ADHD and food. We tried dozens of diets, several different levels of physical intervention… at one point, I was waking up two hours before school so we could follow dictionary the size of a dictionary in this four-year-old’s backpack and have him run a mile with me before he got on the school bus. Nothing. By the time he got to school, he was uncontrollable again like he was never exhausted.”

“Finally, two years after we first heard the diagnosis, we applied for a prescription. It took us another few months to find the right medication at the right level…and literally three months later, our first grader was released.” special education and put him in a real class with children who were not problematic. Now he loves school and is scoring two grades higher in math and reading than his peers.”

“In the end, having our son tagged, openly acknowledged by everyone involved as someone who needed help, but coped pretty well once he had it, was the best thing that ever happened to him. I’ll never regret it.”